Monday, 2 April 2012

Taxi Driver


Have a laugh.

If you've  ever had an Indian taxi driver you'll love this  one...  

 A drunk woman,  stark naked, jumped into a taxi at Fortitude Valley in Brisbane , Australia . 
  
The Indian driver opened  his eyes wide and stared at the woman. He made no attempt to start the Cab.

"What's  wrong with you Luv, haven't  you ever seen a naked woman  before?"

"I'll not be staring at you lady, I am telling you, that would not be  proper, where I am coming from..."

"Well,  if you're not bloody staring at me Luvie, what  are you doing then?"
"Well, I am looking  and looking, and I am thinking and thinking to  myself,
where is this lady keeping the money to  be paying me?!"  
 

Male or Female?



Male or Female?
  You might not have known this....but a lot of non-living objects are actually either male or female. Here are some examples:
     
FREEZER BAGS: They are male, because they hold everything in...but you can see right through them.


PHOTOCOPIERS: These are female, because once turned off...it takes a while to warm them up again. They are an effective reproductive device if the right buttons are pushed...but can also wreak havoc if you push the wrong Buttons.

TYRES: Tyres are male, because they go bald easily and are often over inflated
HOT AIR BALLOONS: Also a male object... because to get them to go anywhere.....you have to light a fire under their ar$e.

SPONGES: These are female...because they are soft......squeezable and retain water.

WEB PAGES: Female...because they're constantly being looked at and frequently getting hit on.

TRAINS: Definitely male... because they always use the same old lines for picking up people.

EGG TIMERS: Egg timers are female because...over time...all the weight shifts to the bottom.

HAMMERS: Male... because in the last 5000 years......they've hardly changed at all...and are occasionally handy to have around.

THE REMOTE CONTROL: Female. Ha! You probably thought it would be male...but consider this: It easily gives a man pleasure, he'd be lost without it...and while he doesn't always know which buttons to push...he just keeps trying.